Speaking of exercise, at
least I walked my doggy ... a bit. Myself and my mutt have a regular
6.45am date. Just me and him, pounding the tarmaradam. But lately,
I've had early starts and haven't always honoured out dates. I've
been feelling guilty about it. At times I've hardly made eye contact
with him.
Speaking of guilt, the
chizzlers. Oh lordy. Even when I've been there, I haven't really
been there, distracted by all that has been going on. I've looked in
at them while they sleep as I head out the door to work before they
wake and kiss them goodnight in their beds.
The reason for this ?
I've been producing a feature film, via my role as Arts Officer in
KCC In the film world, I'm a green horn and so small I'm not even
small fry. It's just one project of many that I am working on.
But it's a big deal to
me. And to the people working on it. I've been working on this for
over 18 months. It started out as a relatively small project, with a
e6k budget. Over 50 people came to a think tank of sorts in Winter
2012 and were invited to submit scripts based on a drama set in the
equine industry. It was to be an online drama, written by local
writers and performed by local actors, shot be local crew. I met one
of the Executive Producers, Tim Palmer last summer and he said to do
it well, we needed to increase our budget ten fold. I didn't sleep
for two nights worrying about it. I was worried because I felt that
a lot of expectation had built up around this and I needed to make it
work. In a rare 'eureka' moment, I realised that I could source the
additional funding from a Per Cent for Art scheme for commissioning
original artwork.
Ferdia Mac Anna came on board as Director last
summer and led the writing team to refine a script. Auditions ran
last autumn. Again, doubt set in. Who would turn up ? Would we
find the right people ? In the end, over 70 people turned up. The
standard was extremely high (although there was a few
memorable-for-the-wrong-reasons audition renditions of Jack
Nicholson's 'you can't handle the truth' speech on A Few Good Men').
Unless you ARE Jack Nicholson, don't go there. It was such a buzz
when we found our cast, breathing life into our characters. It was
running like a machine. Locations sourced and secured. Before we
knew it, it was May.
Stressed and all as I was
about the filming, having a family wedding in the mix didn't help.
Don't get me wrong, I was thrilled and excited about my brothers
wedding in Kerry on the May Bank Holiday weekend.
But let's face it,
weddings are stressful. Ideally I would have had a few days off work
to get myself together for it, but I was too busy with the film. I
had hoped to have my bags packed before my parents arrived from Meath
on Thursday evening. Instead, I had my head over a sink trying to
dye my hair when they pulled into the drive way, as I didn't have
time to go to the hairdressers.
We left for Kerry the
following day, three hours later than planned, but still in good
time. My wee man, bursting with excitement, and known for his
interrogation techniques asked questions the whole way there. The
same questions, over and over AND OVER. My dad, not the most patient
of men started to get cross with Leon. Leon thought it was a joke
and asked even more questions.
After tea with the
in-laws-to-be, I dropped by parents to their hotel. As I was
leaving, someone ran out and said that my mothers head piece was
missing. Badly parked with kids swinging out of the car, I just
wanted to cry. I did a little. We found the head piece. I headed
off.
I stayed in the Gleneagle
Hotel with the children that night, determined to have a good nights
sleep. I drank a large glass of wine and hit the hay. At 3.30am, a
gang of boy racers attending the Rally of the Lakes started a party
in a bedroom across the hall from me. A girl who split up with her
fella had a tearful conversation in the corridor with another fella
who was trying to snog her. I was going to go out and offer her advice, but I just pleaded with them to stay quiet. At 5am, they all went to bed. I was thinking of sending the kids in to jump on their beds when they got up at 6.30.
Denise and Robert's
wedding in Dingle was just fabulous. Mighty craic with great
hospitality. It deserved a blog post all of it's own, but that's
for another day. Suffice to say for now, that Iron Maiden's 'Bring
Your Daughter to the Slaughter' was played after the traditional
first dance, with my brother and his new father-in-law having a sword
fight. It was that kinda wedding.
My parents travelled back
to Kildare with us on Monday, with my dad anxious to get back to the
farm in Meath. I could have cried when he said that they would stay
for another night. Much and all as I love my parents, I'm thinking,
'NNNNOOOOOOO, GO HOME !! I start filming on FRIDAY !!!! Of course,
I said nothing. My dad asked me the following morning if I had 'much on' that week.
The morning that filming
started, I had my car parked with the oddest assortment of props. I
baked canapes for a party scene and raided flowers out of my garden.
I cried. I could feel the stress creeping up my chest. It was all too much. And then filming
started. SSHHHHHH !!
And calm.
We got into our rhytmn. Scenes came
to life. Tenderness. Violence. The comradary. The fun. The
generosity. Euphoria. And then it was over.
And now I'm on come down. The strangest feeling of them all. It started with sleeplessness, then exhaustion. I have barely been able to taste food, or feel hungry. And now I'm over analysing. Self doubt is creeping in. Expectation and anticipation. The fear, oh the fear.
And now I'm on come down. The strangest feeling of them all. It started with sleeplessness, then exhaustion. I have barely been able to taste food, or feel hungry. And now I'm over analysing. Self doubt is creeping in. Expectation and anticipation. The fear, oh the fear.
A launch to organise.
What next ? Who knows ? I've got the bug now, so more of the same
please
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